We have know each other for some time now. We have been with each other day and night going on 30 years right?? Could you please show a little favoritism for your host, and stop with the throbbing pain in the middle of the night? I know something is wrong, and I’m taking you to your own very special dr. for it on Monday. I take very good care of you. I brush you for about 2min. twice a day. I even rub you with a waxy string you like. So please stop falling apart. I would like to keep you around for another… 60+ years. I promise to be good to you.
Only Chewing On One Side
Dear Mt. Dew,
I only drank a little of you yesterday, but you kept me up way past my bed time. You never used to do this to me. I used to drink oz. and oz. of you and it would have nary an effect on me. But last night I’m sure you had something to do with my sleepless night. You and my tooth on the left side… the one clear in the back. I think you two are ganging up on me.
Do you really have to dress like that? My daughter is starting to like having you, and your friends around, but I’m having a hard time finding one of you with adequate clothing. Skirts/Shorts that barely cover your bum, and plunging necklines that plummet to your midriff is hardly suitable attire to wear when tinkering in the imagination of my impressionable 4 year old. Don’t even get me started on the glittery painted on top that is literally... painted on. I would just make cloths and dress you myself but I find it hard to justify the price I have to pay for you, and spend time on cloths for you. So until you can be more creative with your wardrobe choice, you and your friends will be pretty scarce around our home.
I’m so glad you are here. I have been waiting for you
desperately patiently for the last 13 ½ days. I wish you could be here every day.
Money does buy me happiness
I can’t thank Payday without thanking you. So thank you for sending the payday’s my way. And thank you for being so willing to work so hard to make the payday’s possible, while I stay home.. especially when most men wont.
with all my heart,Your Eternal Companion
Go over and visit ShortMama at Family of Shorts for more Dear Someones!